By Brandon Nolta

Morgan Freeman makes a great God. In BRUCE ALMIGHTY, and again in the sorta-sequel EVAN ALMIGHTY, he plays the kind of deity that many people hope and — dare I say it — pray is running the cosmos: warm, witty, and with a certain joie de vivre that belies the Old Testament fire and brimstone. Many actors could play the Devil, but it takes a tremendous talent to play the Big Guy and not come off full of ego or too righteous for words.
   
Unfortunately, I just told you the best part of EVAN ALMIGHTY, a film that makes a serious effort to be a family-friendly comedy, but sacrifices the laughs to the desire to be innocuous. The plot is relatively immaterial, but goes something like this: Newly-elected Congressman Evan Baxter (Steve Carell) has just moved his family into a swanky new suburb as he prepares to take office. Things are going swell, until God (Morgan Freeman) shows up and tells Evan that he wants him to build an ark. As Evan displays a knack for hirsuteness and leading animals in pairs, many misunderstandings involving his wife (Lauren Graham), his faithful executive assistant (Wanda Sykes) and a shady senior Congressman (John Goodman) ensue, leading to a chance to put those boatbuilding skills to good use.
   
Rumor has it that EVAN ALMIGHTY is the most expensive comedy ever made, and it’s easy to see why. The climactic flood scene —  and don’t get your panties in a bunch about a spoiler; the film’s got a freakin’ ark in it, of course there’s going to be a flood —  involves extensive use of green screen and CGI, and it looks good, although nobody will mistake it for realism. If the rumors about the price tag are true, however, it’s hard to see how Universal will recoup their costs (although it’s pretty clear that Universal Studios theme parks could make a fairly good water ride based on the climax).

The problem is that the individual pieces work, but they don’t gel as they should. Steve Oedekerk’s screenplay goes for the tame and expected feel-good lessons, and there isn’t the zing and crackle of the inspired jokes that littered the first half of BRUCE ALMIGHTY before it turned into a treacly piece of crap. Carell, Freeman and Sykes do nearly all the heavy comedic lifting, with a little push from John Michael Higgins and Jonah Hill in bit parts, and all three are up to the task. Sykes is by far the most consistently funny person in the film, despite all her jokes being telegraphed, while Carell manages to fashion a real character out of the broad strokes given him, and perhaps more amazingly, manages to salvage the sarcasm and wit from THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN while keeping it clean. Freeman, as mentioned before, is God. And, as the outtakes show, he dances pretty good for a guy who’s a few billion years old — give or take an eon.
   
When all is said and done, EVAN ALMIGHTY just ain’t what it ought to be. Sure, outside of a running gag involving various animals sniffing Evan’s crotch, and a bunch of dirty phrases that don’t quite reach the money word, this is a film parents can take kids to without worrying about exposure to naughty stuff. Sure, there are laughs to be had throughout the film; watching it isn’t a painful experience, even for the foul-mouthed atheists in the crowd (well, some of them anyway). But, to make up for that, the writing is insipid, the humor is neutered, and in the pursuit of family dollars, the filmmakers missed their chance to deliver something more meaningful by sticking to Hallmark homilies. EVAN ALMIGHTY misses the mighty mark, and when a film costs in the neighborhood of $175 million, just OK isn’t a real good second place.