Monday, July 16, 2007 Rant Archive
We (both) love you, Sally!
Rule No. 1 among friends and bandmates: Don’t let a chick get between you. And, if you do, don’t let her get engaged to some Australian chump.
Yes, Bret and Jemaine are again at odds over Sally, the bad news broad who dumped Bret, then dumped Jemaine. It all starts when Jemaine sees her at the Laundromat, rehashing old feelings — until she finds out he’s still living with Bret. Awkward.
Jemaine dreams of a future with the beautiful Sally, including making “Business Time” with her every Wednesday night, even if the highlight of sexy time for her is probably sorting the recyclables. And no, that’s not a metaphor.
As Sally convinces Jemaine to move into his own place (well, it’s more of a “studio compartment”), Bret rekindles his love for her as well.
The new Head of Household announces the nominations for evictions and Jenerates some heat!
This season’s BIG BROTHER theme is “Alice in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass.” No one has really explained it, so it will remain a mystery until the producers figure America has grown tired of staring at the plucked pink flesh of the houseguests in bathing suits. Anyway, in the backyard there is a giant teacup. The final Head of Household competition question was to guess how many gallons of water the thing could hold. I turned to my wife and said, “Nine gallons! It’s got a big hole in the side to climb into it!” The answer was 10, due to the entrance, as I observed. Everyone guessed over a hundred except for me and my girl, Jen. We are, like, totally on the same wavelength.
Jen explained her rationale for writing down a low number, “I don’t know. I just wrote down a number.” OK, but I still say she and I have a mental connection thing going on. When she got her HOH room, specially designed with treats and photos from home, she immediately took down the picture of herself where she wasn’t wearing makeup. Sure, it was the one picture that had her mother in it, but I admire her conviction to looking good in photos. Do not go Jently into that good night, especially with a bad picture on the wall.
In this episode, super-agent Ari Gold’s assistant, Lloyd, utters the words, “Oh goody. We haven’t been on a stealth mission in awhile.” This is what ENTOURAGE is supposed to be.
Now that MEDELLIN is in at the Cannes Film Festival, things are heating up for Vince and Eric. While Eric is still worried about the next job — the next paying job — Vince exudes his usual confidence that something will come along. Drama is obsessed with obtaining a trucker hat so he will look young on the set of his TV show, and Ari is seizing on the buzz generated by the leaked trailer of MEDELLIN on YouTube. Three story lines; two that dovetail nicely, and one, Drama’s, that delivers an actual belly laugh. This was a very good episode.
The trucker hat can only be bought at a medical marijuana center; to enter the center, Drama needs a medical marijuana card. He somehow winds up in the offices of a hippie doctor who is practically giving the cards away. The doctor is played by the brilliant and underappreciated Bob Balaban. When Turtle suggests he fake nerve damage for the doc, Drama dismisses it with, “I’m too physically fit to have nerve damage. Look at these pipes!” When Turtle asks, “What are you gonna do?” Drama says, “Rely on my improv skills.” It is the perfect setup, and the punch line is up to the task.
Tom’s (Joel Gretsch) search for the elusive Jordan Collier (Bill Campbell) comes to fruition in this episode. Because he views himself as a savior, Jordan has been living in a small town with his followers, who are all on a mission to save the world through the power of Promicin. Meanwhile, Maia (Conchita Campbell) has a vision of the future that shakes her to the core. And, it appears the battle between Jordan’s camp and Shawn’s (Patrick Flueger) has begun.
Kyle’s (Chad Faust) indoctrination to Jordan’s cause continues, and this has created a serious rift between him and his family. Remember, Shawn has been approached by some serious politicos about running for city council; their one condition is that Shawn publicly denounce Jordan Collier. This flies in the face of all that Kyle has learned in “The White Light Handbook.” With more and more people getting their hands on the illegal Promicin every day, it is going to take a battle of the titans to command control of this group. At this point, either Jordan or Shawn can prevail.