By Kofi Outlaw
To quote The Simpsons: “In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.” Such is the premise of Cane, a new CBS drama trying hard to fill that ethnic family/criminal enterprise void left unfilled in a post-Sopranos world. There are slight differences of course: this time around the family business is a mostly legitimate sugar and rum empire run by patriarch Pancho Duque (Hector Elizondo,) his sons Frank (Nestor Carbonell, still in need of eye-shadow reduction,) Henry (Eddie matos) and son-in-law Alex Vega (a beefed-up Jimmy Smits.)
The pilot episode stufss the stage with many drama-down-the-line setups when the Duque family’s old business rivals the Samuels proposition the Cuban clan to sell their sugar cane/rum business. Indulgent playboy Frank is all about selling—probably because he’s humping Ellis Samuels (Rome’s Polly Walker, reprising her succubus role.) As the eldest son Frank thinks that he is the shot-caller; however Alex is unconvinced that selling is the way to go. In his mind, the Samuels want the business because they are aware—as Alex is aware—that the U.S. government is leaning towards sugar over ethanol as the fuel source of tomorrow. The Duque family is poised to be the next oil-tycoons and ambitious Alex is not willing to give that up.
If money weren’t reason enough not to sell, we learn about an incident in the past where the Samuels sent a pair of rogues to kidnap the Duque’s children as blackmail for a pending business deal. Pancho and young Alex foiled the attempt, killing one kidnapper and crippling the leg of another—but not before the family’s youngest member, Lucia, was accidentally killed. Only Alex and Pancho know this bit of history, a secret that binds them closer than Pancho and his blood sons.
Soon a familiar vagrant with a crippled leg is showing up at Alex’s youngest son’s little-league games. Alex begins to feel history repeating itself, thinking the Samuels are again trying to send the message that what they’re asking for should be given to them…or else. He decides to recruit his own team of thugs, keeping them close by until he can checkmate the Samuels at their own game.
Finally, on the night of a large celebration at the Duque mansion, the shoe drops: Pancho announces that he is retiring and that the company will be split amongst his children: 30% going to Frank, 30% to club-owner Henry, 30% to his daughter, Alex’s wife, Isabel (the muy caliente Paola Turbay,) and the final 10% to Alex. For you mathtards out there that means that between his wife and himself Alex now controls the majority share of the company and will act as CEO. This decision drives a huge wedge between family members, specifically sons Frank and Henry, who feel slighted by their father. The Samuels are also less than pleased with this outcome and send their crippled thug to make their point clear by sneaking onto the Duque grounds and luring Alex’s son aside for an innocent, yet ominous conversation about baseball. For Alex, this crosses the line.
The climaxes with Alex confronting Samuels family patriarch(Ken Howard,) a fat, slimy parasite of man who laughs in the face of Alex’s heated bravado. To put action behind his words Alex has his thugs round up the cripple-legged man and drag him out into the swamp, putting a bullet in his head while Alex listens over the phone. Alex has ensured his family’s safety and been rewarded the power he’s been angling for, so all is well in the Duque house…for now.
This show has a sprawling cast comprising the many branches of the Duque family tree. I found confusing to keep up with who was who and what was what in terms of subplots, but to recount a few: Alex’s wife Isabel announces to him that she’s pregnant with their fourth (by my count) child and they hump in joy. Alex’s eldest son Jamie (Michael Trevino) is in love with gringo-girlfriend Rebecca (Alona Tal) and wants to marry her, shirking Alex’s wish that he attend MIT. When Alex refuses the request Jamie rebels, thinking to prove his manhood by enlisting in the army, just like his father once did. Alex’s seventeen year-old daughter Katie (Lina Esco, a Rachel Bilson clone,) is growing up too fast and wants to start frequenting her uncle Henry’s clubs, much to her parent’s trepidation. Patriarch Pancho is diagnosed with a terminal illness; Frank is sleeping with enemy; and Henry is opening new clubs that have the potential to make bookoo money and/or fall under the sway of drugs and corruption. Let’s guess which.
Why this series insists on cramming so many members into the family, with storylines for each member, I can’t say. Ensemble dramas have proven to be great before (Heroes) when kept well organized, but I get the feeling with Cane that we are being gang-probed. Based on our responses to them, story-lines and characters will most likely get shaven away, leaving a much leaner show behind. For now though the show is way too bloated, trying to be too many things without ever making up its mind, and then, passing off that self-confusion as complexity. But Alex Vega is not Tony Soprano and this show (which plays on PC network CBS,) will never have the freedom to venture where David Chase could on HBO. It needs to trim the soapy side-stories involving the young people, restrict its focus to the happenings and relationships between the adults and just maybe it’ll survive the season.
My vote? Blogs and message boards could give the show’s creators the input needed to tweak it, so watch a few Eps with your laptop in hand and be ready to rant. With your help, Cane could turn out to be fairly sweet.