By Jennifer Larson

It looks like Alan (James Spader) is at it again. Sexy new lawyer, Lorraine (Saffron Burrows) has drawn the attention of the youngest lothario at the office. You know what that means; Denny (William Shatner) can’t be far behind. I swear, Denny can smell a women coming from miles away, so can Alan for that matter. God help the woman who finds herself between these best friends, she may just find herself torn in two like a Thanksgiving Day turkey bone. But I don’t know what Alan is doing sniffing around the new girl when his current paramour has put the baby offer on the table. Surprisingly, Alan hasn’t flatly refused to father her child, which tells me he either really likes this woman, or his manhood is bursting at the seems to plant its seed.

When new associate, Lorraine, walks in, Alan almost falls flat on his face. It isn’t just that he’s wildly attracted to her; it’s the fact that this is the same lawyer he got busy with in the elevator last week. You remember she was the one devouring him with her eyes, along with the rest of her body. I think this newbie is going to give Alan a run for his money. She’s so aggressive, it’s almost as if we have a female version of Denny walking around. I wonder if Jerry (Christian Clemenson) will be next? Poor Jerry, he probably wouldn’t notice anyway, he’s got his hands full trying to defend a guy that wouldn’t even speak during the first half of his trial. Even worse is the fact that the other new girl, Katie (Tara Summers) is so nervous about doing her summation she fainted during her practice session with Jerry and Alan. This is already revving up to be quit an interesting season for my favorite quirky law show. Now all they have to do is bring back that crazy gardening fanatic that kidnapped Shirley (Candice Bergin) last season. Of course that will prove to be pretty difficult since he died, but hey if anybody can do it David E. Kelley can.

Meanwhile, Judge Gloria (Gail O’Grady) is pressuring Alan to give her an answer on the whole baby deal. I’m sure having the sexy Lorraine serve herself up to him anytime he wants doesn’t bode well for a yes to the judge’s question. I’m beginning to think Alan’s relationship just isn’t meant to be. I guess the randy judge will have to find herself a new guy. It shouldn’t be a problem for her, since she is known for picking and choosing among the lawyers who plead cases in her court. Then again, if Lorraine buys Denny’s argument, which is that she would be doing the best thing for Alan and his current relationship if she slept with him, maybe there will be a baby after all. With all this sexual tension in the office, it’s a wonder anybody has time to actually work on a case. That’s why it was such a smart business move to hire Jerry back. He and Katie are bound and determined to get their client off, and with everybody else preoccupied, it’s been an uphill battle. It certainly doesn’t help matters when your client confesses, but we all know high-powered lawyers can work around that pesky little problem.


When Katie subpoenas the murder victim’s therapist, that pesky problem with the confession gets a little smaller, because it seems as if the beastly looking suspect really did have an affair with his alleged victim. As it turns out, the confession came after two days of being kept up by the police while they were questioning him. Sleep depravation has made me do a lot of things, but it never caused me to confess to a murder I didn’t commit. But even with all that, this isn’t what you would call an open and shut case. It takes a gifted lawyer to get around all the circumstantial evidence that’s piled up against this guy. Thank god he has Jerry on his side, because he gave a heart-felt and convincing closing argument, even with his hands stuck to the side of his body. But there was no hopping on the way back to the defendant’s table, so I think he’s making some headway.

There were however, several hops when the verdict of not guilty was read. So it was a very good day at BOSTON LEGAL, but not everybody left the courtroom happy. Alan had to tell Gloria he could not father her child, and the husband of the murder victim was told not to leave the jurisdiction. Maybe he’ll be the next client at Crane, Poole and Schmidt.