By Buzz Byrne
Last week the Fei Long tribe considered three members to be voted off… well, since it’s China this year I guess they get voted off the mainland. Leslie, the Christian Radio talkshow host got the heave-ho while Courtney the waif and poker player Jean-Robert got warning shots. Courtney answered this by whining while Jean-Reptile said this was key to his strategy- if you start in last place, you have no where to go but up. He is clearly smarter and more devious than anybody else in the game. The question on whether he survives falls more to if his tribe can pick up on this or not. Courtney said of him, “He sucks soo bad.” There you go.
The loser this week on SURVIVOR was actually the English language. I don’t know what English did to these people but they apparently hate it. Why else would they beat it so mercilessly?
At the Zhan Hu tribe, over-expressive leader Dave pushes Elementary Teacher Sherea to her limit. He just bugs her so she throws away his keepsake clam shells that he was saving for his mother. Dave’s sense of leadership consists of correcting people, giving orders and rolling his eyes when his tribe doesn’t do WHAT HE TELLS THEM TO!
The reward challenge this week was using giant chop sticks to carry a ball of fire to a giant wok. Did you forget they are in China? Next week they will have to ignore what it says inside a giant fortune cookie or some other generic “Chinese-y” thing. Fei Long won, of course and for that they got a Chinese family. A whole Chinese family all to themselves. They also kidnapped Crazy Dave and he wanted to hug everyone. Courtney told him she is a waitress in New York and he almost cried. The guy is having a nervous breakdown and all the people around him can think about is the fish their new Chinese family is teaching them to catch.
Lunch lady Denise from New Hampshire is psyched for the fish. “Flav-AH has never tasted so good.” After the meal she proclaimed it to be the most “delicatest thing” she ever ate. Wicked Pissah!
Dave gave the clue to the hidden immunity idol to Todd. His second clue. Todd must have some kind of magic “Trust Me” dust. All Dave wanted in return was a hug. Dave gave us viewers a wonderful gift as well: the creeps.
His tribe meanwhile was struggling a bit with his absence. They actually had to work. Sherea took this opportunity to what, prove herself? No. She rested and fixed herself with a giant target. I feel this is unfair. Any elementary school teacher who needs her nipples and butt cheeks pixilated for prime time viewing can’t be all bad, right?
The immunity challenge involved Chinese armor and meteor hammers destroying vases. Fei Long with their full bellies won. The Zhan Hu women were again the only ones to be effective in the challenge but it wasn’t enough. At tribal council it was down to Dave and Sherea. Again, given the opportunity to make friends and prove herself, Sherea and her pixilated areas alienated more of her tribe but still they sent Dave home.
I call it a good move. For me. For the team, Erik had it right when he said he wished they could kick them both out. Next week, the game changes! Whatever that means…