By Jennifer Larson

Tonight’s episode of BOSTON LEGAL is Denny Crane’s (William Shatner) worst nightmare come true; an old army buddy who needs legal representation after admitting he is gay. Being that Denny is a right-leaning conservative, he certainly can’t be the one to defend his friend, so Shirley (Candice Bergen) answers the call for him. Leave it to a woman to take care of a sticky situation, especially this woman. Shirley is more than competent enough to handle the case, and more than compassionate enough to realize the position it puts her old lover and law partner, Denny, in. Of course that doesn’t mean she has to ignore the fact that Denny is being a schmuck, yet again, but after all the years she has worked with him, she is used to it by now. And Denny wonders why his romantic relationship with Shirley never worked out. That’s ok, Denny still has Alan (James Spader) to lean on, and really, besides the lack of sex, it’s probably the best relationship the two of them have ever been in. But now that Jerry (Christian Clemenson) has been spurned by his love interest, Katie (Tara Summers), he may be crawling back into Alan’s arms as well.

And speaking of Katie, after achieving successful conclusions for her first two clients, she is bound and determined to help her latest one. Actually, he’s an old client who has come back with another problem, but more about that later. This case is perfect for the newest associate at Crane, Poole and Schmidt, considering that she is one of the only lawyers there who still has a bleeding heart. We’ve already seen how emotional she gets about her work – I mean she was the first person to believe that brooding monster she represented in last week’s murder case – so a custody battle is right up her alley. But she may have to learn how to hold back a little or she may end up having a nervous breakdown. And in this law firm, there is a precedent for that. If you’ve been watching BOSTON LEGAL since the beginning, you’ll remember one of the original partners was carted away to a sanitarium after conducting a staff meeting in his underwear. It must be something in the water; I mean first you have Jerry, whom I adore, but has emotional issues of his own. And then of course there is Clarence (Gary Anthony Williams), or Clarice, depending on the day and mental state he’s in. Then again, Denny Crane isn’t operating on all full cylinders either, so it’s understandable that the staff would reflect the management.

Maybe that’s why I wasn’t surprised to see that Alan has a nervous condition that causes him to blurt out random words. Although, I’ve never saw this happen to him before Lorraine (Saffron Burrows) came into the picture, and she is the only one that brings this condition out in him. Something tells me this little minx is the only woman to give Alan a real run for his money. Of course this probably means he will fall madly in love with her, considering she’s the only woman to challenge him, at least in the sexual arena. But she does appear to be a bit of a strict school marm type, so maybe Alan is just working out some type of mother fixation. Actually, that sounds pretty gross, after thinking about the things these two have done to each other physically. Still, it’s better than hearing a nun get excited about a horny bull.


That’s right our favorite nasty nun from last week’s cockfighting episode is back. It turns out our cock lover – the man who owned the bird, not the nun – is being sued by his ex-wife for custody of their son. The problem appears to be a clash of cultures, as the mother is American and completely horrified at the thought of her 10-year-old son getting into a bullring. So, the cock lover has a bullfighter for a son, wow, what an animal friendly family they are. Actually, the father does continue to come across as a kind and loving person, as witnessed by the many times he grabs hold of every lawyer in the firm’s legs to display his affection. You can imagine how well this goes over with that wacky group. But honestly, Katie did a great job of pointing out how much more dangerous sports and pastimes – like hunting – are in this country than bullfighting, and it is considered an art in most of Latin America and Europe, so really the judge had no grounds to take the kid away from his father. But it was all worth it just to see the Spanish translating nun wax poetic about the beauty and majesty of the bull. I’m counting on her popping in and out throughout the season.

Oh, and as for Denny’s old friend; Shirley won that case, and made some very relevant remarks along the way. In fact they were so germane that the closeted, Republican, army-loving judge had to sway in her favor. I’m sure the fact that he sued a religious institution for failing to take away those nasty thoughts about men he has had his whole life had nothing to do with his decision.