By Buzz Byrne
This week on THE BIGGEST LOSER I get lied to, one team gets its heart ripped out and tragedy visits a contestant just before the weigh-in. And NBC goes surreal for the first half hour.
Every week I fall for it. That deep voiced announcer promises me something amazing on THE BIGGEST LOSER and every week I get my hopes up and every time I am disappointed. This time it was promised, “One trainer goes too far…And IT’S NOT JILLIAN!!” And then they would show a shot of trainer Kim guiltily looking over her shoulder. Jillian blew out a guy’s knee a couple of seasons ago racing him. Could we be looking at something as awesomely irresponsible as that? I hoped. And what I got instead was Kim saying the “F” word to David during a workout…TWICE!!! I say that more times driving my daughter to pre-school.
Six episodes into this season I am conditioned to the show starting at 8:30 pm. Imagine my surprise when I tuned at this time and the first half hour was dedicated to Senator Larry Craig telling Matt Lauer that he wasn’t gay. A whole half an hour of, “I’m not gay, Matt.” “Matt, I’m not gay.” “Do you see a gay guy here? Then you must be looking in a mirror ‘cause it ain’t me!” Or something like that. Turns out it was a news special. I gotta start looking at the TV GUIDE channel.
As for the show, the reward challenge prize was to get videos from home. This reality TV trick was perfected by SURVIVOR and has been co-opted by every sequestering show since. The reason is that it guarantees tears and lots of them. And on the back of Phil, of course, Red team came away with a victory despite Amy’s poor contribution and cried their eyes out.
Things got sad and serious when Jillian had to tell Hollie that her mom had relapse of leukemia. Hollie left the show to be at her mother’s side. Her mother died shortly thereafter and no matter what, there is nothing funny or to make fun of in that.
At the weigh-in team Blue came up huge and won. Hollie’s Black team avoided the elimination room thanks to Jez’s seven pound loss and Bill’s eleven pound drop. That left team Red as the losers. And their voting was mind-boggling. David and Phil voted for Amy, while she and Bryan voted for Phil. The up shot of this was team Blue got to make the elimination to break the tie and of course they axed Phil as he was the strongest single player. Why Bryan didn’t vote for Amy is stunning and will destroy his team and destroy his shot down the line. Dumb, dumb, dumb.
As for Phil, he is now under three hundred pounds and since his involvement with the show lost an astounding 108 pounds. Amazing job, Phil. Keep it up.
Normally that’s how I like to end these reviews but guess who showed up and the very end…Mr. Deep Voice. And do know what he promised me for next week? Do you? THE MOST SHOCKING WEIGH-IN IN BIGGEST LOSER HISTORY.
I know I shouldn’t be excited…but I SO (bleep)-ING AM!!!