By Faith McQuinn

Now that the Red Sox have once again taken the World Series, Fox has returned to its regularly scheduled programming. And someone at Fox thought it was necessary to not subject audiences to simply one hour of PRISON BREAK but two back-to-back episodes of one of the most mediocre series on television.

Sorry to come down so hard on the show, but I’m just ready for something to happen. At least in the first two seasons of PRISON BREAK there were conspiracies and plot twists to keep me interested. This season is full of predictable and dull plotlines.

Remember a couple of weeks ago when there was a new guy in the prison? I was slightly interested in this man, especially since he seemed to recognize Whistler (Chris Vance) from The Ambassador Hotel in Nice. My curiosity was honestly a little peaked. Maybe we’d finally get a little more information on the mysterious Whistler. Well, not so much because the guy’s body was carried out into the yard before the episode hit the halfway mark. I guess he’s not all that important.

But who killed him? That must be important, right? Whistler is suspected, but Michael (Wentworth Miller) thinks it was Mahone (William Fitchner). Was it? We won’t be asking Mahone since some of his FBI buddies just picked him up in the hopes of moving him to a prison in the states. More on that later; back to Whistler’s fate.


Lachero (Robert Wisdom) seems to think the murderer is Whistler, and what Lachero believes goes. The big man grabs a knife, lunges at Whistler and…doesn’t stab him. Instead, one of his lackeys gets it in the gut. I’m sure this moment is supposed to be shocking, but what kind of show would it be if the mysterious Whistler died? (A much more interesting show, I’m sure, but that’s beside the point.)

So now Whistler and Michael are free to go and plan their escape. They’ve decided to use the afternoon soccer match as a distraction, but due to the newly dead lackey strung up in the yard, it doesn’t look like anyone’s going to be playing soccer.

While Michael is trying to come up with a plan, Mahone is being driven away in an unmarked van. Something doesn’t seem right. I don’t know if it’s the franticness of the scene or the ominous music swelling in the background, but I have a feeling Mahone might not make it to the States. I’m actually having flashbacks to last season when Kellerman gets shot in the back of a van. Hmm…I guess I’ll have to wait that one out.


Lincoln (Dominic Purcell), after nearly getting his son’s head cut off, drops by to visit Michael, and finally breaks the news of Sarah’s untimely demise. Michael, of course, is devastated, and if the audience wasn’t absolutely sure of his devastation, we’re treated to a slow motion montage of him crying, hitting things, and crying some more. I apologize for belittling Michael’s grief, but I would prefer him to get angry about his girlfriend’s death and…wait, wait just a minute. Is Michael challenging Whistler to a fight? He’s blaming the man for Sarah’s death? He’s ready to kill or be killed in a chicken foot fight?

I guess I’ll have to wait for the next hour and find out.