Wednesday, November 14, 2007 Rant Archive
This week’s HOUSE M.D. starts with black and white footage of a father (Michael Whaley) and his son (Khleo Thomas) with a facial deformity on train platform and a young girl screaming at the disfigurement. A Discovery Channel/TLC/PBS type network is paying for the reconstructive surgery of the young man so long as they get to film the proceedings. Once the patient is on the operating table everything goes crazy. He has a heart attack. Less than ninety seconds into the show (or show within the show- meta-television? Metavision?) and Dr.Chase (Jesse Spencer) is shouting to turn that damn camera off!
I can be dense when it comes to subtle winks to the viewers, but I think the writers were acknowledging the goofy convention they were embarking on, right at the top of it. House (Hugh Laurie) vaguely accepts the camera’s presence, scheduling most of his meetings with his fellows in places the TV crew cannot follow: MRI lab, hemorrhoid surgery, and those types of places. House has made enough commentary on the reality genre already this season with the over the top parodies, so this time the cut was straight forward- the camera was freezing his fellows. And the reality became hackneyed and scripted. As if we didn’t know that already.
I can be dense when it comes to subtle winks to the viewers, but I think the writers were acknowledging the goofy convention they were embarking on, right at the top of it.
For all its fun indulgences,
viral movie marketing can’t match the rewards of getting information straight from the horse’s mouth.
MTV news sat down last with Heath Ledger last week, to pick the actor’s brain on his latest role as the Joker in BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT, which is just finishing its
principal shoot.
When asked about how it felt to embody the psychotic character of the clown prince of crime, Ledger said “It’s the most fun I’ve had with a character and probably will ever have…”
However, the actor also admitted that he was glad his turn as the Joker was coming to a close: “It was an exhausting process. At the end of the day I couldn’t move. I couldn’t talk. I was absolutely wrecked.”
A time capsule buried by a high school class of 1987 is dug up twenty years later to find, surprise, a body inside. Well, what used to be a body at least. It looks more like teenage boy soup now. It’s amazing what twenty years and some water leakage can do.
Some people may think BONES is just another cops-solving-cases type of show. This week’s episode proved it is no regular procedural. The case of the week--the above-mentioned boy soup in the capsule--only acts as a catalyst for the real story. The time warp brings back embarrassing memories for all the squints while Booth (David Boreanaz) reveals himself as one of “those guys.”
With all this sharing of high school memories, Booth feels so inclined to ask Brennan (Emily Deschanel) about her high school days. When she reveals an embarrassing story about receiving a Brainy Smurf from a crush, he laughs at her. And, like typical Booth, he can’t understand why she’s so upset.
Enter my new favorite recurring character (well, actually the only recurring character) on the show, Dr. Sweets (John Francis Daley). Booth asks him to do an analysis of the victim as well as one of the suspects in order to figure out who killed him and why. At first Sweets refuses, but when Booth grudgingly agrees to “balance the relationship” with Bones, a deal is struck.
Television isn’t the only Hollywood medium feeling the burn of the current
WGA strike]. Following a pre-strike scramble to get as many projects as possible scripted and into production, studio executives find themselves at a crossroads, having to determine which projects to move ahead with and which ones to postpone until the strike blows over.
For studio 20th Century Fox, this presents a high-profile
problem. The studio has two buzzed-about projects already in the “go” stage: the sequel to 1998’s X-FILES movie, tentatively titled
“DONE ONE”, as well as X-MEN spin-off WOLVERINE, starring Hugh Jackman. X-FILES was set to start shooting as soon as December—pulling the plug at this stage could be fatal to the film. While X-FILES could still forge ahead with its shoot (it already has a script and is, for the most part, cast) heading into production without the benefit of re-writes would be like walking a tight rope with no safety net.
Apparently its ok to just throw out random twists to characters and plots on CANE.
The episode started with Frank in the middle of a gambling bender. Apparently Frank has a gambling problem and owed 500K around town for his debts—but who knew? As far as I know this episode was the first mention of it.
While Frank was rolling craps, the rest of the family was muddling around as usual. Apparently Jamie Vega’s girl Rebecca was less blonde Florida beauty than white trash girl from the everglades—probably why she was nervous about her father coming to visit. Even though man turned out to be trashy, and Jamie accosted him for being a bad father, Rebecca still loved him. Isabel got friendly with Ellis Samuels, who had wooed her way back into Frank’s arms. Henry continued to try to woo new Duque master-blender Terry, inviting her to his exclusive pool-party. Terry showed up, with her boyfriend, an Astrophysicist, or something, much to Henry’s chagrin.
Hey gang! Got a little treat for you, an early clip from the supernatural thriller
THE MIST, which is based on the classic Stephen King novel of the same name. If you need a quick reminder about the plot: a small town is suddenly engulfed in a thick white mist, and, fearing some sort of Chemical attack, town residents fortify themselves in a grocery store to wait for help. Soon monsters show up to kill them, paranoia tears them apart and people begin to get picked off left and right. Sounds sweet enough to me, but you be the judge.
Head inside after the break to check out a clip from THE MIST, and you can see more clips by going
here. The movie opens on November 21st.
Denny’s (William Shatner) illegal firing of a fat associate in last weeks episode, comes back to haunt him in this week’s. But Denny didn’t really fire this woman because she is fat; he fired her because she is a fat woman who turned down his advances. You see our dear old Denny Crane still believes he can get any women he desires, which is odd given all the women who have turned him down over the past few years. But it appears that he’ll have none of that from somebody he actually lowered his standards for. I guess fat women are supposed to be happy anybody wants them at all. The fact that Denny isn’t in the best shape of his life isn’t supposed to matter because he is, after all, Denny Crane! And as usual, Denny goes to the only person left who will defend him no matter how guilty he is, Alan (James Spader). You see this woman is now suing Denny and the firm for wrongful dismissal. Meanwhile, Clarence (Gary Anthony Williams) is upset by an internet posting of him as Clarice.
Given how proud Clarence is of his alter-ego, I’m not sure why he finds an internet posting so disturbing. Maybe it’s because it doesn’t show him/her in a positive light, but still, he/she should take this opportunity to stand up for all insecure people in the world who feel they need to hind behind a big wig and even bigger attitude. I mean that’s what Jerry (Christian Clemenson) has learned to do. After all, it was Jerry who tried to help a client who was in love with a storage unit, in last week’s episode; he even ended up agreeing to go out on a date with her.
Kamehameha! That’s right folks, after years of enthralling teenage boys and agitating girlfriends worldwide, a live-action version of famed Japanese Anime series DRAGONBALL will be coming to a theater near you.
The film, from 20th Century Fox, will star Justin Chatwin (WAR OF THE WOLRDS, THE INVISIBLE) as Goku, a Saiyan warrior raised on earth, who must protect the planet time and again against evil villains from across the cosmos, who come in search of seven magical “Dragon Balls” that, when assembled, call forth an ancient dragon able to grant a single wish to he who gathered the balls. In a bit of brilliant casting, James Marsters (Spike from BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER) will don the green makeup of and antennae of Goku’s frienenemy, Piccolo.
DRAGONBALL is being written and directed by James Wong, the man who co-wrote and helmed cult-horror classic FINAL DESTINATION. Actor-director-writer Stephen Chow (KUNG FU HUSTLE) is producing. The film is scheduled to begin shooting late this month, with a worldwide release scheduled for Aug. 15 of next year.
To pull off DRAGONBALL’S ridiculous (awesome is a better word) fight sequences, which would involve combat on land, sea and air, the cast is already in training with 87 Eleven, the stunt company who choreographed sequences on other big action flicks such as THE MATRIX, THE BOURNE SUPREMACY, and ‘300.’ Should be badass.
The plot of this week’s episode of THE UNIT was fairly straightforward and simple, yet at the same time wholly complex.
The episode picked up moments after Hector was killed by a sniper while on mission in Lebanon. Pissed as hell by the loss of a man, Jonas sent the rest of the Unit home, while he stayed behind in Lebanon to ‘tie up loose ends,’—i.e. find Hector’s killer and kill him. Conveniently enough, Col. Ryan had just located that very man, “the Butcher,” just a few clicks away from Jonas’ position. When ordered to return home, Jonas went AWOL.
Back home the Unit members, their wives and loved ones all tried to deal with their grief. Mack watched Hector’s body be cleaned and dissected, so that he could retrieve the bullet that killed his friend.
Welcome to critics rant, where we are now officially psychic! Well not really, but if you do recall, (and here’s a nice fat
LINK to help you,) last week I predicted that Animated film
BEE MOVIE starring Jerry Seinfeld would make a second-week dash to the top of the box office, once mommy and daddy had cooled off enough from
AMERICAN GANGSTER to drive Jr. to the theater.
Turns out I should have been a movie producer.
BEE MOVIE was No. 1 at this week’s box office, taking in an estimated $26 million to barely nudge GANGSTER out of the top spot. Christmas-in-November flick
FRED CLAUS debut at $19.2 million to take the No. 3 spot, while political drama
LIONS FOR LAMBS landed at No. 4, grossing just $6.7 million despite its all-star cast, and once again proving that times are rough for post-9/11-themed films. The film was star Tom Cruise’s worst debut in more than twenty years—though it still did better than
RENDITION.
This week started with Trainer Bob dressing down Neil for voting against his best friend Ryan in last week’s elimination. Neil had tried to explain that Ryan was going home no matter which way he voted. Bob said it was game playing and I don’t think he was far off. Neil claimed to Ryan’s face that it was honorable being sent home by friends and I still don’t understand that. Give me a room full of enemies that help me win a quarter million bucks over a couple of friends that stab me in the back any day of the week.
Neil’s not winning this competition anyway, not while this writer stands shouting into the bandwidth vortex!
Amy tried to find closure with her old trainer Kim by giving back her Red Team shirt. Kim was all like, I don’t want the shirt back and Amy was all like, no, take the shirt and I’m all like I hope you two get stranded on a desert island and Amy eats Kim and no one ever rescues her.