By Curt Schleier
Shane McCutcheon has very quickly become my idol. She is clearly the chick magnet I always wanted to be. In fact, I’m convinced Shane is just her nickname; it’s short for Insatiable. And she certainly is.
Her business, Wax, has gone up in flames. She’s just broken up with a woman she had planned to move in with (and probably driven this woman to revenge arson). But nothing stops her. Shane gets a last-minute gig doing the hair for William Halsey’s (Wallace Shawn) daughter’s wedding. But the wedding becomes a side show for her escapades with two bridesmaids (each believing she is Shane’s one true love) and almost the bride herself. After the wedding it is the bride’s mother – Halsey’s wife – who seduces Shane (not that that’s difficult).
In the end, all three discover that Shane is no one’s exclusive date and chase her out of the mansion in a scene reminiscent of the Keystone Cops. This is my biggest gripe about THE L WORD’S fifth season thus far – too much farce. Perhaps creator Ilene Chaiken thinks of it as comic relief. There will be some serious topics taken up this year – one of which becomes clear this episode – but it strikes me that there’s a difference between something that’s funny and something that diminishes what you are trying to accomplish.
Consider the case of Tasha Williams (Rose Rollins). She reveals the reason she didn’t ship out to Iraq with the rest of her unit is that she is being investigated by the military for homosexuality. I assume they didn’t ask, but clearly someone told. When Tasha consults a military attorney-colleague of hers, he is friendly until he discovers the reason for the investigation. This good ol’ boy from the south was Tasha’s buddy despite their racial differences. But homosexuality is a while other can of worms.
He makes it clear he won’t help in her defense and that her infraction is indefensible. But Tasha wants very much to stay in the military – even if it means lying about her nature. That of course does not sit well with her girlfriend Alice (Leisha Hailey).
Meanwhile the newest “conversion to the L life, Phyllis Kroll (Cybill Shepherd) is starting to feel her oats. After a brief liaison with Alicia, Phyllis has settled in with Joyce Wischnia (Jane Lynch) but finds that too constricting. Now that she’s come out, she wants to stay in with as many women as possible. When Joyce asks her to move in – U-Haul is apparently the Lexpresion for that – Phyllis (after some hemming and hawing) tells her no.
Jenny Schecter (Mia Kirschner) continues to be obnoxious and a Hollywood cliché. Her assistant quits when Jenny won’t even give her time in a Sunday morning to go to church. So Jenny goes to pick up her own laundry. Oh the horror. But then who turns up? Some strange girl, Adele (Malaya Rivera Drew), who worships Jenny and thinks Jenny’s book saved her life. Ohmygosh she’s read it so many times. So what’s a Hollywood cliché diva to do? She hires Adele to be her new assistant.
Helena, still in prison, is threatened in the group shower by a couple of elderly woman, one of whom had been flaunting her far from pert breasts at her. Then she approached the frightened rich girl and pulls out a knife. I have no idea where she kept that knife while she was nude in the shower – but I’m guessing that the blade had a pretty mean stench to it. Fortunately, Helena’s roommate, eh, cellmate, saves her. And how do you reward such bravery? Let’s just say the reward is handed out after lights out.