http://www.criticsrant.com/archive/2007/06/28/Footballer-Wives--Fake-Cancer-a-Shooting-an-Outing-and.aspx Oh, what dizzying heights have been reached in television history! This week on FOOTBALLERS WIVES, I was offended on behalf of Indians, cancer patients, lesbians and the color pink. That’s a lot of plot! Amber finally lost her last screw, after Bruno burnt down her “meditation room”/shrine to Conrad. The dynamic between her and Bruno was nice and tense as he tried his best to parry every one of her insane thrusts. First, she bought him a beautiful straight razor — you know, so he can get a closer shave — all while trying to get him to take a bath. It’s like the story of the Revolutionary Marat and the assassin, Charlotte Corday, only without all the French people. Bruno takes a clever tact by insisting on doing the opposite of what Amber says. She offers him wine, probably poisoned; he intelligently opts for a beer. The showdown occurs over a lovely curry, into which Amber has dumped insecticide; he tries to get her to eat it. She is the worst poisoner of all time. Only dose the dish of your intended victim, not your own, you silly woman. Jeez. She obviously hasn’t seen THE PRINCESS BRIDE, or read “I, Claudius.” en-US Critics Rant info@criticsrant.com Subtext Version 1.9.4.0 http://www.criticsrant.com/images/default_gravatar_bullhorn.png http://www.criticsrant.com/archive/2007/06/28/Footballer-Wives--Fake-Cancer-a-Shooting-an-Outing-and.aspx 77 60 http://www.criticsrant.com/archive/2007/06/28/Footballer-Wives--Fake-Cancer-a-Shooting-an-Outing-and.aspx#1248 WATCHING THIS MADE ME WISH HOW SOON GHOST WHISPERER WOULD BE BACK NEW dorothy fugate http://www.criticsrant.com/archive/2007/06/28/Footballer-Wives--Fake-Cancer-a-Shooting-an-Outing-and.aspx#1248 Tue, 21 Aug 2007 04:01:37 GMT